Betcha Didn't Know This About Me

So, the time came to decide...to go out with the Confessions...of a Picked Mind. Ha ha and ha. Isn't it great, that the world is full of wonderful crazy things, and we can hide from it or enjoy it like it'll get out of stock tomorrow?

I've always been afraid. Of this and that. People assume I'm a free spirited, go-getter, don't-care-a-fig girl, but I've always wondered if that's just a front. I'm actually scared of confrontations because I don't want to be thrust into the limelight without a script (which is what usually happens in a confrontation...). I hate not knowing what's next, or how an exact thing would turn out (I'm a sucker for recipes!)

Before trips, I surf the net for hours looking for and memorizing maps. I'm an OC with lists. I write down everything. I plan and dissect every aspect of my foreseeable future. I lie awake at night turning every possibilities in my head. I've an internal clock that wakes me up at the exact time every day, even with a bad hangover. I diet and count calories so I'd live to see my grandchildren vacation to Pluto.

And then, on the spot, I'd go "What the heck!", and go the opposite way. I lose papers and list and promptly forget where I place things. I go and have confrontations anyway because my mouth is faster than my mind, and my mind is faster than my sense of caution. I snack on chocolate bars and treat myself to ice cream on blah blah days.

Anyway, I'm the anti-thesis of how people perceive me. I'm the exact opposite of what I've managed to become, so far...Isn't that crazy or what?